#thought i was bisexual for like two years until i found out about the others like pansexual and asexuality

[strangersteddierthings]

Bad News First, Eddie

Part One 🦇 Part Two🦇Part Three🦇FInal Part

"Bad news first, Eddie," Steve sighs as he leans back on his heels, cleaner in one hand and a rag in the other. "They vandalized your headstone again. Good news, I beat Wayne out here so he won't be seeing it."

It's been over a year since they'd had to leave Eddie behind. He'd been cleared of the murders. That had been the easy part, since the Upside Down had exploded out into the Rightside Up. When Vecna started killing people it had been pretty easy for people to realize Eddie was just another victim.

Or so Steve had thought.

Eleven saved them all, the people of Hawkins knew the truth, yet Steve still found graffiti on Eddie's grave.

Eddie's grave is empty, because Eddie's body hadn't been recovered. Too much had happened, no time to mount an expedition to retrieve it, and the gates were closed. Another regret Steve lives with.

Like not taking Eddie's face between his hands and looking him dead in the eye when he told them not to be heroes.

Late at night, Steve sometimes imagines he did just that. Looked him dead in the eyes and said, "there is no shame in running, in living to see another day. Don't be a hero because I need you to be okay tomorrow."

Robin says it's not good for his mental health, these what-if scenarios, but so what?

Steve isn't sure what started it but coming out here to talk to Eddie seems to help him clear his thoughts. He always starts with the bad news, Eddie's voice in the back of his mind. Bad news first, always.

The first time Wayne had caught him out here, Wayne thought he was vandalizing. Had scared Steve half to death being yanked back violently by his upper arm. It didn't take Wayne long for his eyes to process that Steve wasn't holding paint.

"You know my boy?" Wayne always spoke in the present tense about Eddie.

"Not as well as I would have liked, sir," Steve swallowed thickly. It was the start of a friendship, of sorts. Wayne seemed happy to have someone to tell stories about Eddie to, and Steve was happy to learn about Eddie.

Months pass and Steve goes every week.

"Bad news. The new guitarist is mediocre at best. Good news. Corroded Coffin lives on and they finally got a new guitarist."

"Bad news. Robin will not shut up about Vickie. Good news. Robin got that date she wanted."

"Bad news. Wayne had an accident at the plant. Good news, he's okay. I think... this might be weird to you, but I've convinced him to move in, at least until he's healed fully so he's not alone. He's staying in the downstairs guest room. Not that you know where that is. You've never even been to my house... bad news, you've never been to my house. Good news, I really wish you had."

So it goes. Wayne Munson moves in and never moves out. Steve's parents call once, to ask if he wants the house. Steve says yes.

Shortly after, Robin takes a room upstairs. Says she gonna take a year off school before college. The Party moves their dnd games to Steve's giant dining room table. His house is always full but part of Steve feels empty.

"B-bad news," Steve forces the words out around the lump in his throat, "I found out too late. Good news, I'm bisexual. Bad news, good news? I don't know man, the news is I could have loved you. I think I do, but that's the you Wayne and the kids tell me about, so who is to say really."

So it goes.

"Bad news. They're seniors this year, Eds. Seniors! Robin going away to college was bad enough. I don't know if I'll even know how to function when they do. 'Cause they're gonna, you know? They're smart. Too smart to stay in this town," Steve is crying, can feel the tears falling, but doesn't stop them. "I know I should go, too. Somewhere else. Anywhere else. But I can't leave. Wayne's here. You're here. And if I go, who will look after either of you?"

"Bad news. College acceptance letters have come in. They're not even graduated yet. This should be good news, but, heh, friends don't lie."

"Bad news, Eds. I can't remember your voice. I didn't think.... I feel like I remember it but I can't hear it. I want to hear it. I-i need-" Steve doesn't know what he needs, doesn't know how to end that sentence so he just sobs, fingers burying themselves into the dirt of an empty grave.

Wayne gets a phone call one day and says he's gotta go back to Tennessee. Eddie's father -that rocks Steve because while he knows Wayne was Eddie's uncle, he never connected that a father was somewhere out there- Eddie's father, Wayne's younger brother, needs him.

Steve drives Wayne to the airport in Indianapolis. Wayne promises he'll return but Steve won't hold him to that. This is family, and as much as Steve pretends, he isn't Wayne's nephew. Isn't Wayne's family.

As Wayne disappears onto his flight, Steve is left hollow. There's no one left in Hawkins that needs him.

"Bad news, Eds. I think I'm a danger to myself. I keep having these thoughts... like how easy it would be to drive my car into the quarry. Or just slip into the pool and take a deep breath. I don't know who I am, or how to be me, without someone needing me."

Wayne calls and tells him he's coming home. Bringing a guest if that's ok. Steve says okay because he needs to meet the man who taught Eddie how to hot wire a car but not play catch. Also, he hopes to hear Eddie in his voice when they speak.

"Bad news, Eds. I'm too much of a coward to meet your old man. Afraid of what he'll sound like. Because I want him to sound like you so fucking bad it hurts. So instead of being home, I'm hiding here."

And then, a miracle happens.

"Well, I've some bad news for you, too, Stevie. I got my voice from my mom."

[midnightechoes]

Five years ago today, She-Ra and the Princesses of Power premiered on Netflix. I had seen a few preview articles about it, and liked what I saw. Those articles mostly focused on She-Ra’s, Adora’s, Glimmer’s, Bow’s, and Catra’s redesigns, and I thought they were fabulous. I loved Adora’s new red jacket and bouffant hair style. Glimmer’s entire redesign was inspired, and I loved that they made Bow black so we could have more diversity in the main cast.

It was She-Ra’s and Catra’s redesigns that caught my eyes the most, though. They made Catra an actual catgirl, and not just in the anime sense where she's just a cute girl with cat ears and maybe a cat tail. She was a full-on furry. It was a brilliant design choice. Honestly it’s no wonder that so many were instantly drawn to her.

And of course, She-Ra herself. I loved her new look, and her huge ass new Sword of Protection. In fact, I loved it so much that I drew this picture of her before the show even came out:

Then the show came out, and needless to say, I fell in love. And honestly, it changed my life.

I know, I know. That sounds very hyperbolic, and to an extent it is, but in a lot of ways, I’m absolutely serious.

Alright, I have to back up a little. Back when I was in college, and for a few years after, a couple of friends and I tried to make a webcomic called The Devil’s Gate. It was minorly successful but eventually floundered. Then I met some people and we tried to make a video game, which also failed. After those few years, I found myself on my own and trying to rework the concept of my webcomic. Making comics, creating stories, those have always been my dream, and I was desperately trying to figure out a story I could make work, something that I believed in. But it never truly got off the ground. By the end of 2015 I had given up on the comic, realizing that after working on it for years in different forms that I needed to step away from it.

I didn’t really know what to do after that. I was still doing my quick daily doodles, but I wasn’t writing, I wasn’t drawing anything of note. I felt emotionally and physically drained of my creativity. I was honestly getting to the point where I thought it might be time for me to give up on trying to be creative or making things all together.

She-Ra and the Princesses of Power came out on November 13, 2018, but despite looking forward to it, I didn’t actually watch it when it came out. It wasn’t until that weekend that I decided to check it out.

I was instantly hooked. I binged through the entire season in two days, and did plenty of crying and cheering. And then rewatched it immediately. I was in love. I was obsessed. It had been a long time since anything grabbed me like SPOP did. I loved the characters. I loved the colorful, sci-fi-fairy tale world of Etheria. I loved how unapologetically feminine it was. And most of all, I loved how queer it was.

I hadn’t done a ton of shipping before SPOP. I’ve been down bad for harlivy for what feels like my whole life, and I was angry when Mika and HG didn’t get together in Warehouse 13, but more often than not I had just been conditioned not to look for queer things in mainstream culture, and even barely in subculture.

That is to say, when I was smashed in the face with Catradora I was surprised how much I glommed onto it immediately. I was absolutely taken with Adora and Catra and their relationship. Both characters were so relatable, and despite not quite being text (although the subtext was so loud and obvious it might as well have been text), it was impossible to not read their feelings for each other as romantic.

It wasn’t just Catradora, even if that was a lot of it. Spinnerella and Netossa being canon from the start was wonderful. How much Glimmer and Bow screamed “BISEXUAL DISASTERS” from the start was adorable. Scorpia’s crush on Catra was as cute as it was sad in its one-sidedness.

I had never really been in a fandom. That is, yeah I’ve liked things, loved things even, but I never found other people to talk about it at length, never found discords just for that thing, never read or wrote fanfic, barely ever drew fanart. 

But, I watched SPOP, and then I watched it again. And then I drew Catra. And then I drew Adora. And then I drew them again. And suddenly I was on AO3, a site I never frequented, reading Catradora fics. And then I had an AO3 account. That December I participated in Catradora Week 2018 (I’d never heard of this kind of thing) and drew two pictures for it and wrote my first fanfic.

By the end of February I had drawn more in the three months since the show had premiered than I had in the previous year. I was working furiously on a long, multi-chapter fanfic, and writing more words than I had in the previous couple of years combined.

I was inspired again.

In the 18 months that SPOP ran for, I drew more than I had in years, I wrote hundreds of thousands of words. I felt so rejuvenated and happy about my creativity and free for the first time in years.

It’s hard to put into words exactly how it felt. I was so close to giving up my art and writing, which honestly, would have been giving up a part of myself. An important part of myself. It’s not overstating that SPOP saved me, or at least my creative spirit.

I also learned about the wonders of being in a fandom and fandom things like fan weeks, big bangs, zines. And I made some wonderful friends that I cherish to this day.

Even as I inevitably moved onto other hyperfixations, my love for She-Ra hasn’t diminished. Plushie Catra and Adora sit next to me on my desk every day. Catradora art still hangs on my wall.

The inspiration that SPOP ignited in me hasn’t died either. It’s carried me through a tremendous level of creativity that I’ve been riding since the premiere. It let me create a ton of fan art for SPOP, and then RWBY and then the Witch From Mercury, and I’ve written a ton of fanfics for RWBY and Supergirl. And perhaps the best, that inspiration has helped me create more OC stuff in the last couple years than I had in a long time.

I owe She-Ra and The Princesses of Power so much. I am so happy that it exists and that it happened when it did. I’ll always cherish it.

And for real, Netflix, SPOP spin-off movies WHEN?!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for indulging in my boyfriend's cuck kink?

Alright, so for some background, both me (25, M, panromantic asexual) and my BF (28, M, bisexual) live in a VERY conservative rural area, literally NOBODY knows we're together even though we've been dating for years and the community is pretty tight-knit, that's how much effort we've put into hiding ourselves. We've thought about moving out but honestly other than the constant threat of being found out our life here is pretty great, we know everyone in the community and are on very friendly terms with them, we were both born and raised here so we're honestly kinda scared of losing everything and starting over in a new place, plus I really want to stay to support my dad because I know he can already get pretty lonely as is (mom works out of town, only visits for holidays if even that, plus I don't have any other siblings to keep him company) and me moving away would hurt him a lot.

Now, with that out of the way onto the actual situation: the cuck thing is something me and my boyfriend have discussed about at length, he's not shy about it to me and I'm always glad to make him happy so I'd be open to trying it if the opportunity arose. The thing is- I never really thought there WOULD be an opportunity for it due to the circumstances described above. Well, that was until a girl we both know confessed to me on Christmas Eve. That girl- let's call her Ellie (23, F, straight(?))- is someone I've actually had feelings for a while now (my BF knows and told me he'd be fine with me dating her as an 'official' relationship, but only if I keep us a secret), however I never did anything about those feelings. I was honestly kinda shocked when the confession happened, but in a good way, and I ended up accepting in the heat of the moment, so now me and Ellie have been 'officially' dating for about a month.

Here's where I think I might be the asshole: since that happened my BF has started to hang out with the two of us while we're acting like a very lovey-dovey couple and he's obviously been getting off on that (as in, it's obvious to me, doubt anyone else picked up on it) and I've been having mixed feelings about this. On one hand we did talk about it and agree to it, but on the other I do think this is unfair to Ellie in a way that I didn't realize previously because I never realistically considered this happening. My BF is reassuring me, saying that it's best we keep hidden anyway and that so long as nobody finds out no harm is done, but I still feel kinda bad about it, yet at the same time I don't really know what I should do in this situation to make it right. The whole thing only gets even more complicated when you account for the fact that Ellie is our pastor's granddaughter and as such comes from a very well known family in our community, a family that has a reputation to uphold, and if the thing about me and my BF came out it would surely impact her badly in that way as well. On the other, she really gets along with my son (8, M) and I really think that she'd make a great mother to him so I don't want to deprive him of that and break things off just because of my own personal drama. On the other OTHER hand I also don't want to break up with my BF because it would feel cruel in my opinion, especially when I very much still love him.

So, AITA for keeping my promise and just going along with this and keeping quiet to save myself and my BF?

What are these acronyms?

[lynzishell]

Character Introductions

We have a lot of new-ish faces in this part of my story, and that’s because we’re getting to know Atlas, Asher, and Lex’s friend group! They’re all going to be sticking around for a bit, whether they’ll be background characters or take on more important roles remains to be seen. Either way, I thought it would be a good idea to take a minute to officially introduce them all and tell you how they all know each other.

Now, I say “new-ish” faces because all of these characters were in The Past arc in the last part of my story. Some of them had dialogue, but most were just milling about in the background. The important thing to know is that they’ve all been friends for years and have become a pretty tight-knit little group.

If you'd like to know more about each of them, then proceed below the cut:

Preferred Name/Nickname(s): Evan Gender/Pronouns: Nonbinary, They/Them Sexuality: Queer

Traits: Genius, Geek, Creative, Perfectionist, Outgoing, Morning Sim Personality Archetypes: Sage & Artist Career: Video Game Level Designer at Rainy Day Entertainment

Important Details: Evan is probably the most recognizable atp. They were one of the first people Asher met on his first day at Rainy Day, and the two of them have worked closely ever since. They have amazing compatibility and have developed a pretty close friendship over the years. As far as the rest of the group, Evan has known them since they started at Rainy Day about a year before Asher did. The only one they knew prior to that is Charlee.

They tend to get stuck in the details, but it makes them very good at what they do. They’re extroverted and very sweet, but often clueless when it comes to certain social cues. It’s nearly impossible for them to hide what they’re thinking or feeling, which can be either annoying or refreshing depending on the situation.

Preferred Name/Nickname(s): Charlee, Peanut (inside joke – only Evan calls her this) Gender/Pronouns: Cis woman, She/Her Sexuality: Bisexual

Traits: Good, Geek, Bookworm, Vegetarian, Goofball Personality Archetypes: Sage & Jester Career: Manages a local bookstore

Important Details: Often found with her nose buried in a sci-fi book, or on the computer going down random rabbit holes about some conspiracy theory or another. Absolutely believes in aliens, ghosts, vampires, and time travel. Full of useless facts, puns, and pranks.

Charlee grew up next door to Evan, and the two of them have been best friends since childhood. However, she didn’t meet anyone else until the day she met Blaire. At the time, she had just started working part-time at the bookstore and Blair was visiting while on a book tour. The two unexpectedly hit it off, and Charlee was later introduced to Lex and Tess… only to find out that Lex worked with her best friend! And the rest is history.

Preferred Name/Nickname(s): Blair Gender/Pronouns: Cis woman, She/Her Sexuality: Lesbian

Traits: Self-Assured, Creative, Bookworm, Noncommittal, Dance Machine, Muser Personality Archetypes: Artist & Lover Career: Author – Writes mystery novels

Important Details: In the middle of a long series of mystery novels and becoming quite famous. When she’s not writing, Blair has a passion for dancing and kick boxing. She is blunt and flirtatious and would do literally anything for her friends and family. She lost a sibling unexpectedly at twenty years old, and it changed her entire outlook on life. She’s regularly championing for her friends to follow their dreams (including Atlas and Asher), and she’s the first person most of them are likely to call if they’re ever in trouble.

Blair used to date Tess and is currently dating Lex. She met Lex at a queer speed dating event when she first moved to San Myshuno. They didn’t hit it off romantically at first and remained just friends until a few years ago.

Preferred Name/Nickname(s): Tess Gender/Pronouns: Cis woman, She/Her Sexuality: Lesbian

Traits: Art Lover, Creative, Perfectionist, Neat, Loyal Personality Archetypes: Artist & Caregiver Career: Financial Analyst for a big corporation in Uptown (fun fact: the same corporation Dawn worked at when she first met Phoenix)

Important Details: Tess is good at her job, but she hates it. She has a passion for photography, and Blair is constantly trying to talk her into taking the leap to open her own studio, but she’s afraid of letting go of the perceived stability/security that comes with her corporate job. Maybe she’ll do it one day, but today is not that day.

Tess and Blair used to date, but they quickly realized it wasn’t going to work out since Tess prefers exclusive romantic relationships, and Blair very much does not. However, the two have remained very good friends. Through Blair, she met Lex and the rest of the Rainy Day crew.

Preferred Name/Nickname(s): Jensen or Jay, Jenny (Ash is the only person that gets away with calling him this) Gender/Pronouns: Cis man, He/Him Sexuality: Bisexual

Traits: Outgoing, Geek, ADHD, Loyal, Music Lover, Gregarious Personality Archetypes: Jester & Lover Career: Video Game Developer at Rainy Day Entertainment (will likely be promoted to replace Atlas as Lead Developer)

Important Details: Jensen is only one in the group that was friends with Atlas before anyone else. The two of them have worked side-by-side for nearly ten years… though both of them are usually wearing headphones… but they do chat a fair amount and are pretty good friends.

Jensen is super laid back and can get along with pretty much anyone. Once Lex and Evan started inviting him out with the group, he clicked with everyone else instantly. Aside from Atlas, he gets along most with Charlee, Blair, and Kamryn… and apparently, he’s hooking up with Charlee now… I didn’t see that coming, but I love that for them.

Preferred Name/Nickname(s): Kamryn, Kam Gender/Pronouns: Cis woman, She/Her Sexuality: Pansexual

Traits: Self-Assured, High Maintenance, Music Lover, Dog Lover, Materialistic, Night Owl Personality Archetypes: Hero & Sinister (interesting combo ??) Career: Video Game Character Design and Animation at Rainy Day Entertainment

Important Details: While she enjoys her job, Kamryn’s passion is music. She produces House music and DJ’s regularly at various local and out-of-town clubs. Blair and her often butt heads on whether she should leave her job to pursue music full-time. From Kam’s perspective, her day job pays the bills and allows her to make the music she wants to make, the way she wants to make it, without the pressure of needing to make money from it.

When she met Ash, she was so happy to finally meet another Dog Lover! They’re always talking about their dogs and sharing photos. Maybe when Ash gets another dog, one that actually lives with him in the city, they can take their dogs on play dates!

Preferred Name/Nickname(s): Aubree, Bree Gender/Pronouns: Cis woman, She/Her Sexuality: Bisexual

Traits: Creative, Loves the Outdoors, Foodie, Vegetarian, Cheerful, Observant, Mediator, Compassionate, Morning Sim Personality Archetypes: Artist & Jester Career: Video Game Architect at Rainy Day Entertainment

Important Details: Aubree is amazing!!! Next to Atlas, she’s the most introverted of the group. She’s one of those people that is really quiet, she just kinda sits back and listens, but then when she speaks, she says the most insightful things.

She hates conflict and avoids it at all costs, but she’s great helping others navigate it and find a middle ground. She has a unique ability to see and understand others’ perspectives and is usually the first person everyone wants to come to for advice.

Lex has adored her since she first met her, and immediately befriended her. It took her a while to feel comfortable with the group, but now they’re all like family to her.

Her and Atlas are interesting together... I feel like if he opened up to her, she'd have great advice for him... but they rarely talk. In fact, what he likes most about her is that she's one of the few people willing to just sit in comfortable silence... and vice versa.

[mischiefbuckley]

Do you have a link to the interview where Oliver said buck and Eddie were supposed to get together at the end of season 4? I thought he said something like they were going to explore buck’s sexuality then, but I don’t remember him saying that they were going to put buck and Eddie together

Hi there anon!!!

It’s not explicitly said flat out said again that Buck and Eddie were suppose to be together in the interview, but context clues to what happened during that time and the entire set up for the end of season 4 that’s why the assumption is that was the plan to have them get together at that point. Oliver alluded to the fact that the storyline was brought to him years ago, it was ultimately shut down for whatever reason and until the had the show shift over to ABC is finally where Tim Minear came back as a writer and had then proposed this storyline for Buck for season 7.

With the Buddie part of it for season 4 again you have Buck going to therapy and getting comfortable with his own feelings and one quote that Buck says early on in season 4 that I found interesting while doing my rewatch prior to season 8 airing was when he said to his therapist is, “Hey Dr. Copeland. I’m going good. I’ve actually been — been thinking a lot about what you said in our last session and how I hide my true feelings from others. I’m starting to think you might be right.” Again at this point Buck was not romantically involved with a woman at this point until he had reconnected with Taylor later in the season and if the idea got proposed during this time who would they have Buck get together with other than his best friend and again when would Buck realize that he’s in love with Eddie the moment his best friend is shot and he doesn’t know what to do with himself like the set up was there for the reveal, just for whatever reason Fox decided against it and we have Buck get together with Taylor and Eddie is with Ana at this point until they break up in Season 5 along with Buck and Taylor breaking up

Throughout the show as well there’s always been the inclination that Buck has been a bisexual character and again as Oliver has said Buck’s bisexuality isn’t dependent on who is involved with at the time because at the end of the day bisexual means he is attracted to more than one gender regardless of who he has dated or is going to date. I just think the chemistry and history is there with Eddie many people including myself would love to see Buddie happen on our screens hopefully soon

I did find these quotes interesting from two interviews Oliver did that were released post episode 1 of s8

So sorry anon didn’t have a direct answer, but that’s the assumption that was drawn from that quote in the interview that Oliver did months ago hope that kinda explains it and makes some sense 😅

[threewaywithdelusion]

Roy/Keeley/Jamie Fic Snippet

This is an except from a longer fic I'm writing. The set up is that at this point Roy, Keeley, and Jamie are doing V-shaped polyamory because Roy refuses to date Jamie while he's his coach. They're all aware of their feelings for each other though. Takes places post S3.

October brought with it the Rainbow Laces Campaign. A decade in, it was fairly uncontroversial to wear rainbow laces for two weekends in October to show support for the LGBTQ+ community. Roy admired the goals of the campaign, and he thought it had made some progress. There was even a player out in the Championship League. 

But Roy also knew that locker room culture was hard to change. The homophobic jokes at Richmond hadn’t stopped until Colin had come out and this was their first Rainbow Laces Campaign since. 

The lads seemed extra determined to do it right this year, in a show of solidarity for Colin. 

Every single player had committed to wearing the rainbow laces and Isaac’s captain armband was rainbow as well. Rebecca had set a policy that any homophobic slurs would get a fan immediately tossed out from the stands. 

All the rainbow in his face everywhere he looked made Roy think about his own sexuality. It wasn’t something he’d given a lot of thought throughout his life. The people he’d found attractive had been mostly women and while he’d occasionally found men alluring as well, he simply hadn’t acted on it because of football. It hadn’t been particularly hard — not when there were so many beautiful women looking to date or shag a famous footballer. Then men he’d found attractive had been few and far between and he’d never had an emotional connection with any of them, so it had never been anything worse pursuing. 

Until Jamie. 

The week before Rainbow Laces kicked off, Roy cooked dinner for the three of them. They were in the kitchen, Roy at the stove, Keeley at her computer working on promo for the team, and Jamie sitting on the counter and looking pretty. 

“I talked to Colin,” Keeley said. “He doesn’t want us to even hint at having a gay player on the team. So all of the Richmond Rainbow Laces promo has to talk about the queer community generally, so no one will point fingers.”

Roy hummed as he checked on the potatoes in the oven, extra cheesy the way Keeley liked. 

“But he’s not the only gay player on the team,” Jamie said. 

Roy turned around. 

Jamie was frowning at Keeley, who closed her laptop to give him her full attention. 

“But Colin doesn’t know that, does he, babe?”

“I suppose not,” Jamie said, looking torn. “I know Jake Daniels is out in the Championship League and everyone does all this rainbow shit every year. I just. I remember being a little lad and getting my first crush on a boy and thinking it was the worst thing in the world because if anyone found out, I would never get to play football. Not like this. Not at this level.”

Oh. 

Roy hadn’t realized that sexuality was such a big deal for Jamie. He’d figured Jamie was like Roy, a bloke who’d gone through life mostly without caring about finding boys attractive or what that said about him. 

But this was part of Jamie. This secrecy and shame and fear was part of what had shaped him into the man he was. 

“What are you?” Roy asked gracelessly.

Jamie frowned. “What?”

“You said gay, to Keeley,” Roy said. “But I just realized I’ve never asked. What are you?”

“I’m bisexual,” Jamie said slowly, looking surprised. “Like Keeley. Aren’t you?”

Roy grunted and shrugged. 

“But you like chicks?” Jamie asked. 

Roy nodded. 

“And you like blokes?”

“Some blokes,” Roy said. 

Jamie planted his hands on the counter behind him, leaning back and spreading his legs invitingly. He tilted his chin up like a dick and smirked. “Oh, yeah? What kind of blokes get you going?”

“You’re a prick,” Roy said, turning back to the stove. 

Keeley laughed, bright and loud, and Roy basked in the sound of her joy.

“So you don’t have a label?” Jamie asked. 

Roy kept facing the stove. “No. It never really mattered to me.”

“What didn’t?” Keeley asked. “Labels? Or your sexuality?”

“My sexuality,” Roy said uncomfortably. “I never felt like it defined me.”

“But wasn’t it scary, like?” Jamie asked. “Being a gay footballer?”

“I never felt like a gay footballer,” Roy said honestly. “I just felt like… Roy Kent, who occasionally checks out bloke’s arses.”

“A very straight thing to do,” Keeley says imperiously. Then, “You don’t need to label yourself, babe.”

The oven timer beeped and Roy pulled the potatoes out and set them on the stovetop to cool while he finished with the chicken. It was almost done, golden brown on both sides. 

“It matters to me,” Jamie said, voice small. 

Roy heard movement behind him and when he peeked over his shoulder he saw that Keeley had moved to stand between Jamie’s legs. 

“And that’s okay too,” she said. 

Roy grunted in agreement. 

He knew Keeley had realized her sexuality young and had dated women for a large portion of her twenties. He knew she was open about it, both at Richmond and to the few magazines that had asked. She’d always seemed so settled about being bisexual, like it wasn’t a big deal but also wasn’t a part of her worth hiding. When she’d started dating Jack, Roy had been hurt to see Keeley with someone else but he hadn’t been at all surprised to see her with a woman. 

He couldn’t imagine Jamie’s experience growing up bisexual. His mum would probably have been fine with it, if he’d told her, but Jamie’s dad would have hurt him if he knew. Jamie had carried ideas about toughness and masculinity with him to his first year at Richmond and he’d been an absolute prick. But it must have hurt a lot before he learned to harden himself against the pain. It must have hurt to think that the thing you loved most in the world wouldn’t love you back if you showed who you truly were. 

Roy imagined a young Jamie laying in his childhood bedroom wishing to be different and it made his heart hurt. 

Then Jamie’s words came to him: I hung a picture of her on my wall, didn’t I?

He thought of the poster of Keeley holding two footballs in front of her chest, hung right next to a poster of a much younger, much hairier Roy. 

He thought of Jamie’s reluctance to answer Keeley’s question about his first celebrity crush and the way he’d only answered once Keeley had stuck the word “woman” in the question. 

“Holy fucking shit,” Roy said. He turned around and and pointed at Jamie. “Who was your first celebrity crush?”

Jamie gave him a crooked grin, while Keeley hid her laugh against the skin of Jamie’s forearm. “Finally figured that out, did you grandad?”

“Who was your first celebrity crush?” Roy asked, stalking closer. Roy’s kitchen was pretty big, but he still somehow found himself pressed against Keeley between Jamie’s legs, Jamie grinning cockily down at both of them. 

“Well, I hung a picture of him on my wall, didn’t I?” Jamie asked, smirking. 

“Fuck,” Roy said. 

He’d been Jamie’s first celebrity crush. 

It was slightly weird, being reminded how much older he was than Jamie. But it also made him immensely aware of the scant centimeters between his hips and the insides of Jamie’s thighs. Made him feel the electricity arcing between them. 

“Oh, wow, you both have a praise kink,” Keeley said. 

It broke the spell. 

“What the fuck?” Roy demanded. “I don’t have a praise kink.”

“Your pupils got absolutely massive when Jamie said he masturbated to your poster on his wall,” Keeley said. 

“Oi! I didn’t say that.” Jamie blushed a pretty shade of pink and Keeley gave Roy a conspiratorial wink. 

“But it’s true,” she said, still instigating shit. She leaned in close enough that her lips brushed Roy’s ear then said, loud enough for Jamie to hear, “So’s the praise kink.”

Roy choked on his own saliva and almost missed the sound of Jamie’s whine. 

Keeley grinned wickedly. “I think dinner’s ready, don’t you?”

She pushed Roy back and casually sauntered from between Jamie’s legs, heading to the table. 

Roy looked at Jamie, whose eyes trailed after Keeley before meeting Roy’s. 

“She’s trying to kill us,” Jamie said. 

“Yeah,” Roy said. 

Five minutes later they were seated at the table and Roy’s hard-on had mostly gone down. Jamie had also been squirming in his seat the first few minutes but Keeley ate like she was absolutely unaffected. 

Roy knew she was having fun fucking with them, but he was impressed by her acting chops. He could never have acted that casual while this turned on. All he could see was Jamie’s red bitten lips and the hickey on Keeley’s breast just barely peeking out above her collar.

“You have to talk to Colin,” Keeley said, drawing Roy’s attention back to the conversation. 

“What?” Jamie asked. 

“If you want to say someone on the team is gay, you have to talk to Colin. Even if you’re only hinting at yourself, the media will speculate and every single player on the team will get scrutinized. Including Colin, who already said he doesn’t want the attention.”

Jamie nodded a few times. “What do I do if he says no?”

“I think you already know the answer to that, Jamie,” Keeley said. 

“Yeah,” Jamie said, looking dejected. 

***

The next day at training, Roy saw Jamie drag Colin into the boot room. They were in there a long time and Roy had to fight the urge to burst in and see what was going on. He knew Colin wasn’t going to react badly or hurt Jamie, but Roy couldn’t stand the idea of Jamie in there alone. 

A long twenty minutes later, Colin came out of the boot room with a dazed smile on his face. 

Roy pushed his way inside and found Jamie sitting on the bench, looking shell-shocked and disappointed. 

Roy took a seat next to Jamie and pulled Jamie’s head into his shoulder. Jamie curled into him, wrapping an arm around Roy’s waist. 

“He said no?”

“He said no.”

***

That weekend they played Newcastle and every player wore rainbow laces. At the post-game press conference, Roy said generic things about supporting the LGBTQ community. 

They didn’t mention a gay player on the team. 

***

The next weekend, they were playing Arsenal. Right before the match, Keeley came into the locker room, one hand half-heartedly over her eyes as she called out a warning that she was walking in. 

Roy, standing at the whiteboard with Beard and Nate, watched as she beelined straight for Jamie and threw something in his lap. When Jamie held it up, Roy saw that it was shoelaces in pink, purple, and blue. 

Jamie gave Keeley a look of wide-eyed panic and confusion.

The whole team looked on as Keeley smiled and said, “To support your bisexual girlfriend.”

Jamie’s grin was a slow thing, unfurling until it occupied his whole face. He tugged Keeley down, giving her a dirty kiss. 

“You do not have to stick your tongue down her throat in front of everyone,” Jan Maas complained. 

Keeley and Jamie flipped Jan Maas off in synchronicity. 

“Oi, Tartt!” Roy yelled. “No being a prick without the signal.”

“Yes, Coach,” Jamie said, eyes shining. He immediately started unlacing his boots so he could switch to the bi laces. 

Keeley came over to Roy, smiling. He couldn’t help but smile at the look of pride on her face and the smile on Jamie’s and he heard Colin mutter, “his face knows how to do that?”

“And for you,” Keeley said, pulling a plastic whistle on a pink, purple, and blue lanyard out of her pocket. “So they don’t say Jamie’s the only boyfriend who supports me.”

Roy took the whistle. “I hope you don’t expect me to blow this thing.”

“That’s what she said!” shouted one of the lads. 

“I would never,” Keeley said, smiling. She pulled him into a kiss as well, before announcing to the room as a whole, “Good luck boys! I’ll be cheering you on from Rebecca’s box.”

As soon as she left, everyone started talking at once. 

Roy made eye contact with Jamie and he could tell that they were both thinking the same thing. I love her so much. 

Then Colin drew Jamie’s attention, gesturing at the shoelaces with a tentative smile, and the moment was gone. 

[triplexdoublex]

Let Go (Chapter 1)

Paring: Jaden Hossler x Landon Barker

Tags/Warnings: blonde Jaden, dual POV , internalized homophobia, homophobia, religious gulit, scent kink, masturbation, mentions of Coopers death,

A/N: Breaking this long ass fic into chapters as requested. Landon’s 20 as this takes place last year.

Landon

Ever since Jaden started working with my dad and signed to his record label, our house has become his second home. And with a new Album in the works, Jaden’s been here more than usual lately, recording with my dad in his home studio until late at night. Most nights after recording he just crashes here. Despite the house having numerous guest rooms, Jaden usually opts for sleeping in my room.

The first time my dad introduced me to Jaden the two of us clicked right away and quickly became best friends, so I don’t mind the company; in fact I might enjoy it a little too much.

Jaden

After a long , but productive day of recording it feels great to just chill and play some video games in Landon’s room before we go to sleep. Landon’s sitting cross-legged on his bed just scrolling through social media, while im sitting at the end of the bed kicking serious ass in Call of Duty. I honestly love that about our friendship, how we can be doing totally different things at times and yet still enjoys eachother’s company. And there’s never any need for annoying small talk or pressure to feel like either of us have to keep the conversation going. But at the same time we can talk to each other about anything and everything. The only other person I was able to do that with was Cooper. Fuck, I miss him, man. His death broke me, and although I’ve been getting help and healing I’m not sure I’ll ever be fully put back together, but I’m trying. It’s part of the reason why I crash in Landon’s room almost every night. Besides it being easier than going back home for the night, staying with Landon makes feel less alone and keeps me from getting lost in own head. He’s been a big help with adjusting to life in LA too, Moving from the south to LA a few years ago was a bit of a culture shock for me, and I don’t know what I would have done without Landon in my life to guide me through it. I seriously love him so much…No Homo. Ugh, I wish I could stop feeling the need to think or say shit like that anytime I compliment or express how much one of my male friends mean to me. Growing up in a Conservative Christian household in Texas and Tennessee will definitely do that to you. I’ve definitely grown as a person and have become more open minded and accepting since moving to LA. I’ve met and worked with some of the coolest people, a lot of which are from the LGBT+ community, including some of my fans—who i adore more than anything. I’m tying my hardest to let go of the homophobic ways of thinking that’s been ingrained in me from my life in the south and Christianity, and for the most part I have. I even joined an inclusive church out here but something about it still makes me uncomfortable for some reason and I can’t quite put my finger on it, and why I have the insitent need to make sure no one assumes or gets the impression that I’m gay, because I’m not, I’m totally straight.

Landon

I’m bisexual, I’ve known that for some time. Maybe bi-curious is more accurate? I don’t really know. All I know is as far back as I can remember I’ve found both women and men attractive, I thought everyone did. It wasn’t until I was like fourteen and one of my friends asked me if I liked the outfit he had picked out for the first day of freshman year, and I told him I thought he would look cute in it, and he asked me if I was gay? I never gave it much thought before, with LA being one of the most LGBT+ friendly places in the United States, I never really had to, it didn’t matter. But after that I found myself wanting an answer to that question too. And with some unsupervised computer time and a bottle of lotion, I quickly learned that I was, in fact, at the very least, bisexual. And although I never actually developed any crushes on my male friends or felt the urge to experiment with them, the glow of the computer screen in my dark bedroom at night became a routine, became like NyQuil to me. I’ve kept it to myself all these years, never feeling the need to come out as it was more of just a guilty pleasure and I was content with not taking it further in real life, but that all changed one day this past year while playing basketball with Jaden in the LA heat. I was about to go for a slam dunk, when Jaden jumped right in front of me, arms up, blocking my shot. The sweaty musk of Jaden’s underarms fighting its way through his fading deodorant took me by surprise. I don’t know if it was his pheromones or what, but I would have bottled the scent and doused myself with it until I drowned, It was that intoxicating. I wanted more, wanted him, his sweat, his smell, his body, his everything— fuck, I wanted Jaden.

Jaden

I’m about win Call of Duty when out of nowhere I get shot.

“Fuuuck, I was sooo close,” My body falls back in defeat, my head accidentally landing in Landon’s lap. “Oh shit, dude, sorry!” I quickly sit back up, but Landon stops me.

“It’s fine,” he says “I don’t mind. You’ve been playing that game all night. Just relax.”

“O-ok, you uh..” I scratch the back of my neck, “You sure?” I question, but I’m laying back down before he even answers.

My brain is overflowing with confusing thoughts: Is this normal? Do guy friends do this type of stuff? Is this cuddling, it certainly feels like at least a form of cuddling. And my body seems to be responding the same way as it does to cuddling; I feel safe and comfortable and a little warm inside. I’ve only cuddled with girls though. I didn’t know you could cuddle with your guy friends too? And that’s like acceptable? I’m still learning where the line between anti-toxic masculinity and being gay crosses or if that’s even a thing? But one thing is for sure, LA and the South have VERY different opinions on what’s considered gay.

What’s considered gay in the South: looking at another guy for more than two seconds, hugging another male (a quick pat is all you need), giving a guy a compliment, having excellent hygiene— hell I know some guys that don’t wash their ass cuz ‘it’s gay.’

What’s considered gay in LA: Actually being gay. So since I’m straight I guess this is okay? I hope so because I hate to admit that I really like this.

Landon

Don’t touch his hair, don’t get hard, don’t touch his hair, don’t get hard .But fuck it’s all I wanna do. I’ve had this fantasy many times before except usually he’s face down in my lap, my fingers lost in his hair as I palm the back of his head.

I shake my head to clear the image from my mind like an Etch-a stretch.I hate that sometimes my desire for him is so strong, I think about him in ways I know he wouldn’t approve of. It feels like betrayal, it feels wrong. He’s my best friend, I don’t like hiding this from him, but I know, he would be disgusted with me if he knew, I mean wouldn’t anyone, gay, bi or not? Imagine finding out the person you trust the most has been secretly getting off to you. I do my best not to give into the temptation, but how can I not when he’s gone at the studio all day and my bedsheets still smell like him.

I shouldn’t but I do, I let my fingertips flirt with pieces of his bleach blonde hair— my absolute favorite look on him by the way— aimlessly twirling small tuffs as Jaden searches through Netflix for something to watch. In the short time it takes him to choose something, my fingers have found themselves even deeper, my nails lightly grazing his scalp in a circular motion. I half expect him to tell me to stop any second now but when he lets out a small moan, it’s me who stops.

Jaden

“Holy shit, man, I’m sorry. I-I just got way too relaxed there for a second,” I blurt out in embarrassment the second I feel Landon’s hand pause in my hair. It was kind of an odd thing for him to do in the first place, and at the beginning, my old ways of thinking started creeping back in, but then I noticed my body slowly relaxing into his touch. We’ve spent so much time together lately, I think he’s just stating to know me better than I know myself, because after a long day in the studio, relaxation, is exactly what I need

“No worries,” Landon says with a small chuff of laughter “Everything’s all good bro. You really gotta stop apologizing tonight.” He starts scratching my scalp again but then pauses once more. “Do you want me to stop?”

“Actually, umm i-if you don’t mind doing it just a little longer, it’s really helping me unwind before bed.”

“Of course,” Landon agrees.

Landon

And now he’s asleep in my lap. God, he’s so beautiful, I could stare at him forever; his flawless skin, jaw so sharp it could kill a man, his full pink lips just slightly part—nonooonoo, fuck, I gotta get him off me before my dick wakes him up first. I cradle the back of his head with my hands and gently lift him from my lap, replacing my body with a pillow. He’s on my side of the bed, so I have no choice but to sleep on his.

Not even five minutes into being on his side I know there’s no way I’m getting any sleep, because despite being tired, part of me is very alert right now. I can’t control it, his smell is all around me; the sheet under me, the blankets on top, and don’t even get me started on his pillow— I can see the TMZ headlines now: ‘Landon Barker dead at 20! It appears the son of Blink182’s drummer, Travis Barker has died from accidentally asphyxiating himself with a pillow.’ I’d bury my face in it and forget to come up for air.

There’s only one thing I can do to fix it, it certainly isn’t gonna go away on its own. This time I allow myself to think of Jaden as I tug on my cock because I know it’s the quickest way to finish; alternating between pretending my tight grip is his mouth and his ass. I get too lost in the fantasy and before I can stop myself a breathy “Jaden,” tumbles from my lips…

[madwomansapologist]

Hello!

Can i ask for a esmeralda being obsessed with female reader who is a princess and goes to one of her dances ??

esmeralda being obsessed with you would include

Masterlist | Rules | Taglist | Library | More Esmeralda | AO3

synopsis: It was just another presentation. Just another normal day. But when Esmeralda saw you, when she saw your eyes shining, she knew nothing would never ever be the same anymore.

warnings: yandere themes.

note: Esmeralda was my bisexual awakening. I respect you, anon. A person of very good taste.

• You don't even know how many rooms there is to explore on your palace. So many floors, towers, hidden entrances. You can sleep every night on a different chamber and it would take you years to repeat one of them. And yet you feel imprisioned.

• Such a large place, but confiner still. Such a great amount of people there, but lifeless still. At every step, breath, dream: its walls echoed a question. A question that you knew everyone was somehow asking you, a question you didn't know how to respond, a question that haunted you since your childhood: "How smaller can you be?"

• It was only a matter of time until you finally run away. They should've know better.

• Disguised, covered with a faded cloak, running away from the guards who were looking for you: you were free. Wandering the streets, seeing your people living their lifes, you saw for the first time what life was like in France.

• Everything was fine until you made eye contact with the Guard Capitain. He saw you, he recognized you, and you saw his hand moving to warn his men where you were. Without further choice, you did the best you could: you blended in with the ground.

• Moving through the crowd afraid to be found, you didn't notice the dance until you were right in front of the stage. And when you saw, everything stopped. You were mesmerized.

• And so was Esmeralda. She noticed the movement. The disturb in the crowd. Esmeralda had to learn to watch her surroundings. The hooded person moving made her thought the dance would stop sooner, but then it feel from your face.

• Suddenly the music seemed louder. The same rhythm as her heartbeat. Esmeralda understood that no other sound could compared. It was a perfect symphony. Intricate melodies. Whole orchestras played just for her. Just for the two of you.

• Esmeralda danced looking into your eyes. It was a public presentation, but she was dancing for you. Only for you. She danced for your scared eyes, until they turned into hypnotized. She danced for you golden aura, for your perfect smile, for your body. Esmeralda danced just for you.

• Then she heard the guards. Esmeralda heard their orders, how they were searching for someone in the crowd. She heard everything, but she didn't take her eyes off of you. And she saw your fear.

"Come with me," Esmeralda reached out for you. You took a step back. "What's a poor girl gonna do alone in this world?"

You didn't want to come back to your home. You didn't want to be forced to pretend you're perfect. You didn't want to spend the rest of your life without knowing what it means to truly live. It may seem crazy, it may seem stupid, but you reached out for her. You trusted her.

As you both ran, the guards being left behind by Esmeralda's wit, you realized that you don't really have anywhere to go. You didn't plan this far. Most of your soul believed you wouldn't be able to even get out of the palace without being caught. "Where are we going?"

Your voice made her insides burn. With your delicate hand holding hers, your delicate, unscarred palm, Esmeralda felt like she was reborn. Everything about you felt new to her. "Somewhere safer."

• You felt so grateful that a total stranger chose to help you. At first you thought she may have recognized you, but when she asked for your name you knew she didn't. Esmeralda. A beautiful name, for a charming women.

• At her home, safer from the guards, your tiredness screamed through your body. Your eyelids were heavier, your muscles throbbed, your words tripped over your tongue. Esmeralda was so kind to offer you her bed.

• When she saw you were deep asleep, Esmeralda got closer. She hold your hand into hers, and read your palm's lines. So soft, so tender. She could stay this way forever. Just you and her, safe from the rest of the world.

• And Esmeralda will do anything to make it happen.

GENERAL TAGLIST: @suakemi @notanalienindisguiseblink

if you enjoyed, please reblog! i promise it makes a difference ♡

@ madwomansapologist.tumblr.

[dorianwolfforest]

"Dorian you havent talked about your SSO OC's in DECADES and I'm feeling so lost and blue! Please please please tell me about your ocs!!!" I hear you say, and I understand, so I bring you now a comprehensive guide of all of my sso oc's and their role in the story of Star Stable online. As this is up to date on lore, there will be spoilers for the main quests in here.

Dorian Wolf - he/him

Also known as: The orange one, idiot coughing baby, my child, Rob's husband

Dorian Wolf grew up in Valedale, the oldest of three children, in a (non-druid, keeper-unrelated) cult called the Light of Aideen. The Light of Aideen valued femininity and the likeness of their goddess above all else, and as a result of this Dorian was often looked down upon in favor of his two younger sisters. Already as a young child he learned how to cook, he was taught ballet (and figure skating in the winter), and when he was left unsupervised, he experimented with the powers of witchcraft he was born with, something he had to keep from the cult due to their volatile nature toward witches. When he turned 18, Dorian fled Valedale and found refuge in Ydris' circus, where he works to this day as a trapeze artist and occasional helper around the grounds.

He's a gentle, kind, and thoughtful guy who doesn't understand the concept of being evil for the sake of being evil, often giving people the benefit of the doubt despite what their previous actions would lead any reasonable person to believe. This has led him into a romantic relationship with Rob the smuggler.

Rebeca Forest - they/them

Also known as: Warthilk the void demon, Ah Fuck Which Order Do These Hair Colors Go In, Bisexual hair guy, Violence upon the village

This bad boy can have so many detachable eyeballs. Rebeca (then Warthilk) was summoned by Dorian one stormy night when Dorian tried to use his witchy powers to summon a glass of warm milk. He misspelled the necessary runes and instead summoned Warthilk, the void demon. Dorian immediately unbound the demon from him, apologizing profusely for the intrusion, and Warthilk, who usually enjoyed spreading chaos and cruelty across the land, felt so fucking bad for this pathetic, wet noodle of a man, that they adopted a human name and now spends their days making sure Dorian is okay. They live at the circus but do not, under any circumstances, help out.

When they think they can get away with it, Rebeca will make peoples lives miserable. If they think Dorian will catch on, or if they think their actions will negatively impact Dorian, they will instead collect themselves and repress the urge to ruin peoples days.

Sienna Opaldew - she/her

Also known as: The token cis, Reasonable ms stuck up fancypants, That is not your natural red stop lying, The Mom Friend, trust fund

Sienna has lived in England her entire life, surrounded by all the riches her father could possibly surrender to her. She always had the finest clothes, the finest horses, and the finest gear. That satisfied her until her 20's, when she found herself pregnant, single, and ostracized from her usual social life. In an effort to find some kind of community beyond her father's pockets, Sienna tried to figure out where her mother, who left the family when Sienna was a baby, could possibly be. After figuring out that her birthmother lived on Jorvik, Sienna moved over there without so much as a thought, desperate to find some kin that could love and appreciate her and her son for who they are, rather than for financial gain. That was never to be, however. Sienna's real mother is Ms Drake, and when she finally finds her Jorvegian side of the family, her parents start to use her against each other.

Sienna does have friends and a support system in Dorian, Rebeca and Percy, however, and helps them out financially when they struggle (something Rebeca accepts readily and happily) in return for some babysitting duties. Her son, Nicholas, is 2 years old when the story takes place. Sienna is not a soul rider.

Persephone Nightmore - she/they

Also known as: Percy Nightmore, Sephia Nightmore, The discord kitten, e-girlboy, the one not traumatized

The more I look at the art I've drawn of Percy, the more I realize I have no fucking clue who they are. She's still relatively new to the roster. They are a twitch streamer who's "close" with Sienna. They are not a soul rider. That's it. That's all I got. Love her tho.

Rose Bittering - he/they

Also known as: The guy with a gun, Half-man one-third-pink-crystal the-rest-machine, Fucking weirdo

Rose is, without a shadow of a doubt, a bad person. He works for DC, creating the drones and robots the company uses to spy on soul riders, transport Darkonium and disrupt the druids. If you've ever destroyed one of his precious creations, they will shoot you with bullets. Rose hates the robot guards on the DC oil rig, as they were set up by the previous mechanic and are not his own creation.

Rose is only loyal to DC because they fund his own habits and experiments, allowing him to do whatever it is they do in their lab without checking up on him. Some of the things they do include: watching anime illegally, cannibalism, and putting metal in microwaves "just to see what happens".

When Rose was a young teen, they got trapped in Pandoria for a long period of time and, as such, suffer severe crystalization which has carved out a large portion of their back, their eye, and has rotted off a finger. He is so overexposed and radiated that he often breaks digital things, preferring instead to work with old-fashioned mechtech. It is very possible that he was killed in the DC oil rig explosion, but if he wasn't then he will soon perish as his body is continuously failing him and he has to continue to upkeep parts of himself, such as a makeshift, magically infused spine, in order to function as a person.

[yelenasdiary]

Read this or don't, that's completely fine. I was going to explain everything in a reply to an ask that I was sent but an anon that has nothing to do with this, they are lovely! I just think a post on its own is more appropriate.

Below the cut I warn you that topics like, Sexual Assault, Physical & Mental abuse are spoken about. Please do not bother to read this if you're not comfortable. I literally do not expect anybody to read this, I am simply posting this because of how I am feeling towards the asks I received before I went to bed last night.

I just want to say that I've been open about certain things in my life on here and that is simply because I want my blog to welcome everybody (within reason). I want those who unfortunately have been through similar stuff to feel seen, heard and know you are loved! I want those who feel alone to know that you're never alone, I am here for you, my blog is here for you.

This isn't the first time I have received asks about my sexual experiences. A month or two ago I received a spam of asks that I never answered because of how disturbing and outright disgusting they were. Now, after last night, I feel that I need post this. I am not asking for anything in return, I just want to make that clear. All I want is for people to understand the hurt I am currently feeling.

I've always been open on here about the fact that I am a virgin. It's nothing that I feel ashamed about, I don't think there is anything wrong with it. I know there are plenty of people like myself who are also virgins. I wish there were more people who are open about being a virgin, if people can be so open about the fact they aren't a virgin, why can't we be open about the fact we are?

So when this anon asked if I was a virgin, I was honest and said yes. My mind was already racing with "oh god, what's next?" and I was just hoping whoever they are was jus being curious. But instead, I feel like they've made me ashamed of the fact I am a virgin, 25 and write smut.

TW; SA, Physical & Mental Abuse Mentioned -

A few of you would already know that unfortunately yes, I am a victim of sexual assault. I was a child and it was something that happened daily for a couple of years. Due to this, I have trauma, PTSD, depression and anxiety. I grew up with little knowledge on the basics of sex because of how triggering it was for me. I couldn't sit in on sexual education classes, I couldn't joke around about penis's with my friends let along look at one. For so long, I genuinely believed what happened to me was normal. I was 12 when I realised it wasn't.

It took me years to even be okay with the topic of sex, to see it in movies or even think of it. My sexuality wasn't something I always questioned, I had a big crush on Bieber during my teen years and there were a few other male celebrities that I found rather attractive, it wasn't until I was 17 that I saw women in a different way and tbh, the feeling I got from thinking about myself in a relationship with a woman was a lot more comforting then it was to thinking of myself with a male.

Did my abuse make me bisexual? Maybe. I don't know. I don't really care. I like women a lot more than I like men, I feel more comfortable talking to women than I do men.

Did my abuse stop me from having 'normal' teenage experiences? Yes. I have never physically been with anybody, I have never kissed anybody nor have I ever been on a date. Is that sad? maybe to some, to me? No.

I have little to no trust in males. Given that my abuser also physically abused me for such little things and mentally, I don't know what it feels like to not have the thoughts I do about myself. This person has ruined so much of my life and has had control over what I do because of the trauma they caused me.

But all that aside for a moment, I am still a human. I am a woman who still feels things. I am learning every day of new things. I have done plenty of research for the things I felt I missed out on in school. I have a best friend who is so fucking patient and understanding with me that he will explain things to me if needed.

Writing & reading smut over the last year has been really good for me. I don't mean that in a weird way, I mean that in a way it has helped me explore things I didn't know were a thing, it has helped me grow more comfortable with sex and that sex is a normal thing. Don't worry, I know what is written in smut is purely fiction, I know what happens in porn isn't real. I am not stupid.

But I can't sit here and say that smut has been really helpful. Some of you might not understand that and that's okay. But I have come a long way with being comfortable and finally feeling like I can be open about things I enjoy.

Back to this anon.

Yes, I am 25 and never had sex. I have never voluntarily sucked a guy off. i have never voluntarily slept with a male, touched a male or seen a males body. Why any of that is important to you makes no sense to me. You have brought back things that I wish to not think about. You have made me feel triggered and as though I shouldn't be writing such topics because of my lack of experience. You had no consideration whats so ever and I believe found it rather funny.

I am feeling so many feelings and having thoughts that I wish to express but I know you'll most likely see it has a sob story and make matters worse. What I do hope though is that if you have read this that you understand that your words and actions hurt. I am not weak for telling you this, I am not weak for not having any sexual experience, I am not weak for asking you to understand that your thoughtless actions were not called for.

I do not need to have sex to know what I am doing. I do not need to have sex with a cis male to know how to write about dicks. I do not need you to make me feel ashamed of this either.

This is already such a long post and I don't even expect anybody to still be reading this but if you are, please, please remember to always be kind! spread love, support and happiness. You honest have no idea what your words and actions can do to somebody. Be aware and be considerate, you would never want your closest friends to feel that way I am currently feeling.

I am sending love to everybody, if you ever need a friend to talk too my DMS//asks are always open. I will listen and be whoever it is you need 💜

[remuslupinschocolat3]

My stardew valley headcanons because no one can stop me!!!!!!!

Part one

In alphabetical order

Abigail:

💎Bisexual

💎she/they

💎Hates children

💎In a Polycule with Sam and Sebastian

💎Shares a braincell with Sam

💎smoked weed once with Sebastian and threw up afterwards

💎has random beef with Haley that Haley isn't aware of

💎gets piercings just to spite her dad

💎was only good in English class in highschool

💎regrets being on 2020 alt tiktok

💎 secretly vandalizes their father's yoba shrine (he thinks it's Sebastian doing it)

💎their gay awakening was Keira Knightley in Pirates of the Caribbean (she just like me fr)

Alex

🏈the definition of comphet

🏈himbo

🏈gay man/lesbian alliance with Haley

🏈his first crush was the team captain of an Opponent's school gridball team

🏈 doesn't drink alcohol because he's scared to be like his father

🏈he had a pathetic crush on Elliot when Elliot first moved to the valley

🏈has a bottle of the perfume his mother used to wear and sprays it on his pillow when he's sad

🏈used to go to a gym in Zu City but stopped after a boy there asked him out

🏈dated Haley in highschool for half a year until both of them came out to the other in hopes to let the other down gently

Caroline

🍃not a single thought behind those eyes

🍃fell out of love with Pierre ten years ago

🍃grows marijuana plants in her tea house (have you seen her two heart event?)

🍃dyed her hair green once when she was 15 and never tried a different color again

🍃has a few secret tattoos

🍃the necklace she wears is a gift by Rasmodios

🍃best friends with Jodi and Robin

🍃loves to gossip, she knows everyone's business

🍃almost became an almond mom but stopped before it could affect Abigail in the long run

🍃she has no enemies, everyone loves her but hates her husband

Clint (it's red cus he's a red flag)

🔨4chan user

🔨incel

🔨used to tell his mom to make him a sandwich

🔨called his parents by their first names

🔨knows the Irish dance (I don't know what it's called lmao)

🔨can't have friendships with women because he always thinks they fall in love with him

🔨hasn't exercised since he finished highschool

🔨stalks Emily (that's canon) (stay away from her)

🔨can you tell I hate him yet?

Demetrius

🧪is the reason his first marriage failed

🧪controlling and possessive (Maru's two heart event)

🧪so boring

🧪thinks missionary is the only way to have sex

🧪I know people headcanon him as autistic but I think he's just petty

🧪 arrogant, thinks he's smarter than everyone else because he knows science

🧪was actually an okay step father to Sebastian until Maru was born

🧪him and Robin are not compatible but neither of them want to go through a second divorce

Elliot

🦀 gay and proud

🦀in his mid thirties

🦀 can't swim

🦀 used to write star trek fanfiction as a teenager on fanfiction.net

🦀so fucking tall

🦀went through three separate gender identity crisis before realizing that he just isn't comfortable expressing himself as a stereotypical manly man

🦀demi romantic

🦀gay man/lesbian alliance with Leah

🦀sees Leah as the little sister he never had

🦀 isn't really broke, he's a trustfund baby who wanted to experience what it's like to be a starving artist (thinks it makes his art more valid)

🦀Leah beat him up when she found out

🦀 obsessed with his hair (I'm so jealous of his luscious curls 😭😭😭)

🦀so dramatic (used to be a theater kid for sure)

Emily

🔮the character I headcanon as autistic

🔮 pansexual and asexual

🔮they/she, trans

🔮dating Sandy

🔮knows everyone's zodiac signs

🔮names her plants

🔮gets the zoomies after work (at night)

🔮Haley hates it

🔮Haley's biggest supporter

🔮vegan

🔮thinks of Clint as a genuine friend (save yourself girly pop)

🔮calls Sandy the weirdest nick names "hello my cuddle bear" "it's been too long since we last saw each other my strawberry jam"

🔮suckles on Pennies (she just like me fr)

🔮reads books about crystals for hours on end, Haley has to take the book away from her and drag her to bed sometimes

🔮has befriended the junimos

🔮Sandy sells the clothes she makes

🔮hates the taste of strawberry in candy and stuff

🔮would vape if vapes existed in stardew valley but not in a I'm a thirteen year old boy way but in a I like the taste and I enjoy making smoke rings kinda way

🔮you can't tell me that she's not a pothead

🔮knows Haley is a lesbian years before her sister figures it out

🔮besties with Shane (refuses to sell him alcohol at the Stardrop saloon)

🔮gets extremely flustered around people she deems as attractive

🔮is really bad at doing her own makeup (Sandy or Haley do it for her)

🔮has a huge tattoo that covers almost her entire back

🔮her energy is contagious

🔮high School was very hard for her but college was the best time of her life

🔮wants to buzz her hair so bad but has enough restrain to keep herself from doing so

🔮loves to make cocktails (she makes Gus try them and he always loves them and puts them on his menu)

🔮makes Shane, Sandy and Haley cosplay with her (none of them want to but they can't say no when Emily looks at them with that wide eyed grin of hers)

🔮unleashed a group of rats in JoJa mart because Shane complained once (1 time) about his working conditions, the store closed for two months

🔮can you tell how much I love Emily?

[bluegekk0]

Who else is part of the Alphabet Mafia in Dirtmouth?

Ooooh I like this one, I'll take this as an opportunity to talk about all the characters in Dirtmouth since it's pride month.

I'll ofc start with the Vyrm family before I get to other characters.

(under a read more cause it's looong)

Vyrm - as I mentioned before, I see him as demi-gay. He wasn't even aware that he was gay until he formed a close bond with Grimm, so I think it makes sense. Plus all those experiences of demi people that who describe their attraction as "suddenly clicking" that I read, match how I see Vyrm realizing he has feelings for Grimm. He definitely one day suddenly thought to himself that Grimm is really really hot and he started noticing things about Grimm's body that made him feel things, blushing whenever Grimm made eye contact with him, and in general just finding his mind wander in quite inappropriate directions. That was what put him on the (slow) journey of self-discovery, since he hasn't actually felt that way about anyone else before, even WL, because as it turns out, he just didn't feel that way towards female beings. And as for gender identity, he's cis and uses he/him pronouns. Born male and has never seen himself as anything else, though he's not that rigid in regards to how he presents.

Grimm - bisexual with a male preference, 100%. He had years to experience casual relationships of all kinds, and he definitely found himself attracted more to male partners. He did have a more serious female love interest years back, though it didn't work out. As for gender identity, he does present as male, use male pronouns and so on, though he has no issue acting in a more feminine way and does so quite often. So it's safe to say that he's not as strict with his identity, he's just Grimm. There's also the fact that biologically he's both male and female, as that's how he created his body. I hesitate to use the term intersex for him, as I know it doesn't fit him and I wouldn't want to potentially add to negative stereotypes. The closest thing would be hermaphrodite as it's used in biology (particularly in regard to animals), but I also don't want to use that term because of its negative connotations when used to describe a person, even if it matches what he has going on better. So, in short. He's both, and he chooses to present as male. His pronouns are he/him but he'd have no issue being referred to as she or they, he just doesn't use them himself.

Lewk, the twins - they're too young to even begin comprehending identity and attraction, and consequently I haven't thought about it either. What I can say is that being raised in a household where gender norms practically don't exist would help them be more comfortable with whatever identity they eventually feel fits them best. And as a little side note, I think it would be really cute if Lewk, who was raised very sheltered, didn't realize for the longest time that having two dads wasn't a universal experience. Not that he'd react negatively to opposite-sex relationships, I think he'd just be a bit confused. As for pronouns, they use those associated with their birth sex, so he/him for Lewk and Milo, and she/her for Asta.

Hornet - I definitely see her as a lesbian. A lesbian with no game, so no one even knows since she's not very open about it either (though Grimm can definitely tell hahaha). I definitely think she notices female bugs far more often, but she has no idea how to approach them and maybe even rejects the feeling. Not because she's against having a girlfriend, she just struggles with accepting close relationships in the first place out of fear that she'll lose them. And for gender identity, she is female, though very gender non conforming. She dresses and behaves in a way that makes it ambiguous, but she feels comfortable referring to herself as female. The only term she's uncomfortable with is "princess", but that has more to do with what such title entails rather than it being feminine. She uses she/her pronouns.

Holly - they're aroace to me, they show no interest in relationships despite becoming more open about their emotions. If someone flirted with them, they wouldn't know how to respond, and I think they find the idea of intimacy as something nice, but not for them. They're much more interested in their hobbies and the familiar bond with the rest of the household. As for gender identity, they use they/them pronouns, non-binary or agender would probably be the closest matches. Biologically they're neither, their body is made of void, and void has no distinction between male or female. In regards to how they present, they tend to copy the looks and mannerisms of those around them, so it varies significantly.

Zote - in regards to attraction it's a bit complicated. I feel like he'd talk about female bugs that way because of that whole "a knight and a maiden" idea, so you'd assume he's straight, but I could totally see him slipping up and calling a male bug handsome and showering them with compliments about their appearance. In reality I think he might be a very confused asexual, though a closeted bisexual could also be a possibility. For now I keep him as unlabeled. As for his pronouns, he uses he/him only, and gets quite upset at being called anything else.

---

Ok, now for the side/minor characters.

Brumm - he's gay, he had a male partner and adopted children in the past, and since then he hasn't shown interest in females. He also presents as masculine, and uses he/him pronouns.

Divine - lesbian (which means that the whole Leg Eater scenario didn't happen in the AU, lucky for him), she has a very strong lesbian wine aunt vibe to me. I can see her using she/they pronouns, even if they present as very feminine.

Ogrim - he's straight, he had a brief relationship with Isma back in the day, and hasn't shown interest in any male bugs since then. He presents as masculine and uses he/him pronouns.

Elderbug - straight. I will say, I don't think the dead friend he mentions was a potential love interest, but I do think he's straight. He uses he/him pronouns.

Cornifer and Iselda - they're partners which suggest that they're straight, but I could see one of them (or maybe both?) being bisexual. She/her pronouns for Iselda and he/him fir Cornifer.

Bretta - bisexual, leaning towards women. She was enamored with Zote for a bit before seeing through his lies, and now has a crush on Hornet. As for pronouns, I quite like the idea of her writing under a fictional, male pseudonym, and if that's the case then she would be fine being referred to as either she, he or they.

Jiji - unlabeled, they might be ace or just not interested in having a relationship right now, and that layer of uncertainty matches her. overall mysterious vibe. Uses she/they pronouns.

Jinn - similarly to Jinn, its preferences are unknown. She uses she/her, they/them and it/its pronouns interchangeably.

Mato - he doesn't live in Dirtmouth but I'll mention him here anyway. I think he's bisexual, though he tends to be a bit secretive so it's not very obvious. He/him pronouns, presents as very masculine.

Quirrel - similarly to Mato, he doesn't live here, but he frequently visits the town to give lessons to the children. He's possibly straight or bi, I haven't decided. And he uses he/him pronouns.

---

And while I'm at it, I'll mention other more important characters here, who don't live in Dirtmouth.

The White Lady - bisexual, I feel like she's the type to not really notice gender in regards to attraction. Perhaps pansexual would be more fitting, but I think the two terms can be used interchangeably and I don't want to get into semantics, so I'll stick to bisexual as the umbrella term. In regards to presentation, the Lady part of the title definitely didn't come from nowhere, so they present as overall feminine, though I do quite like the idea of her using both she/her and they/them pronouns. I could see them referring to themselves as "we" whenever she speaks, and I do want to start using they/them pronouns more often when talking about WL, since I think it matches the character.

Lurien - unlabeled, very likely gay, but he chose to not have a partner so it's a very private matter for him. He wears robes and a mask that completely cover his entire body so his identity is quite ambiguous on the surface, and I like the idea of his voice being just as difficult to describe. That said, he does use he/him pronouns, so that's one of the only clues.

Lemm - possibly an old bitter gay man, or perhaps he's straight. I don't think he ever had a partner so it's difficult to say, and he definitely doesn't talk about it. He/him pronouns.

Tiso - he's straight, I thought it would be pretty funny if he had a bit of a crush on Hornet (completely unaware she wouldn't return the feelings even if she didn't hate him), but because he's awful at expressing it, he just ends up acting like a jerk to get her attention. He/him pronouns, nothing to mention here.

---

There are many more characters in the AU that I haven't mentioned, but they're so minor I haven't even thought about them that much. So these are the ones that I treat as more prominent. As you can see, most of them are queer in one way or another. Seems like the infection turned the bugs gay. Many such cases.

[daydreamingleclerc]

something special about june // lauren james au

in which, lauren and her housemate-turned-girlfriend sports journalist come out on instagram during pride month 🤍

includes; slight sexual content, swearing, wlw content !

this is something v different for me! but i’ve been so in my lauren feels lately i cannot help myself. who knows. i might even write something to deepen this AU further! inspired by this article about jess carter and ann-katerin berger! enjoy xx

DISCLAIMER: i am in no way shape or form suggesting that lauren is bisexual or gay by posting this. this is simply just a form of fiction and i do not mean any harm. pictures were found on instagram and pinterest and all rights are to their original owners.

*

yn✔️

liked by samanthakerr20, chelseawfc, masonmount and 12,702 others

yn say cheese 😁😚❤️

tagged: laurennjjames

view all 12,830 comments

samanthakerr20 yn this is the gayest jumper i’ve ever seen

yn took notes from you clearly x

laurennjjames ❤️😚

yn 🥰❤️

ldnpride oh my god are you two…

yn lauren’s wearing a leather jacket and i’m wearing a jumper straight out of 1946 do the math x

laurennjjames ✔️

ibiza, spain

liked by yn, samanthakerr20, reecejames and 30,957 others

laurennjjames winning on and off the pitch, clearly 😍

tagged: yn

comments on this post are limited

yn i’d like to point out i got my hair done at the hotel hair salon

yn just incase ppl are confused by my hair change midway through this dump

laurennjjames i’m more concerned about the amount of people thirsting over your arse

yn don’t post it then u silly sausage

kmewis19 yn is packing in that first pic

yn do you like it 😼

yn ✔️

liked by laurennjjames, leahwilliamson, naomischiff and 34,729 others

yn wonder if we’ve beaten the just friends allegations now x

tagged: laurennjjames

view all 18,829 comments

laurennjjames lesbian!

yn i know u are but what am i x

laurennjjames a glorified bisexual 🤨

lew.mount put some clothes on

yn don’t tell me what to do

benchilwell you guys are NEVER going to beat the just friends allegations ���🤣

yn we could release a sex tape and we still wouldn’t beat the just friends allegations

reecejames how do i burn my eyes 😃

bethanyengland4 you two are so cute🥹

yn thanks bethy ❤️

laurennjjames✔️

liked by yn, samanthakerr20, jesscarter and 108,638 others

laurennjjames i remember when she thought she was straight until she saw me in a towel.. happy birthday to my favourite cougar ❤️

tagged: yn

view all 31,739 comments

yn cougar?! i’m 2 years older than you watch ur mouth LJ.

laurennjjames yeah babe that makes you a cougar 🤨

yn love you really 🫶🏼

laurennjjames love you too foxy lady

samanthakerr20 funny how loz and i are thé youngest ones in our relationships yet we’re the ones you answer to🤨 happy birthday yn 🤣🔥

kmewis19 you’re so evil

yn that was so uncalled for samantha sleep with one eye open tonight.

chelseawfc HBD yn 😋💙

reecejames happy birthday yn 🥂💙

yn✔️

liked by laurennjjames, mbrighty04, leahwilliamson and 103,793 others

yn lauren cant answer ur call rn cause she’s busy reecejames

tagged: laurennjjames

comments on this post are limited.

reecejames how do i bleach my eyeballs

reecejames no ew wtf i can’t look at this

kmewis19 you two are the WORST

yn nothing wrong with a lil PDA 🫶🏼

amberrosegill stealing this pose for me and jen

yn ur welcome x

laurennjjames ✔️

liked by yn, leahwilliamson, reecejames and 60,738 others

laurennjjames life lately 📸(ft the missus)

tagged: yn

view all 12,739 comments

yn wow

yn that first pic 🥰👍🏼😍🔥

yn seriously you make me so 🥰🥹

yn god.

laurennjjames okay love don’t embarrass yourself x

yn can i just say the difference in my rack compared to lauren’s is very very amusing to me

laurennjjames i love your rack

yn i 🫶🏼 ur ironing board too ig

samanthakerr20 🔥🔥

mbrighty04 fashion is unmatched

yn ✔️

lake como, italy

liked by amberrosegill, bethanyengland4, mbrighty04 and 23,739 others

yn the one where the lesbians went to italy and got kicked out of an art gallery for snogging

tagged: laurennjjames

view all 89,738 comments

laurennjjames why’d you have to post the pic of you in the green dress 🤤🤤🤩

yn bc i love it when you get all mushy

laurennjjames i don’t think mushy is the word you’re looking for 😍😼

samanthakerr20 is that…. yn in JEANS?!?!

yn it was a one off and it’s never going to happen again.

[lunastarlight593]

Gonna talk about my Cannon Rook and Dragon age a lot on here so I’m introducing Anna “Taron” de Riva!!! I love her so much and the questions are from @pinkhallaclub

1)Where in the Thedas is your Rook from?

Anna is born and raise in Tevinter, specifically from Minrathous until she was 13-15 years old

2)What is your character’s alignment?

Chaotic neutral or true neutral. Anna will do whatever she believes is right, even if it seems wrong to others and will be really reckless/won’t think before doing. At least at the beginning of the game

3)Race and subclass?

A human mage

4)If your Rook was companion, where would they be found?

She would be found in Minrathous on a contract, kinda. The “contract” is actually one she failed a year or two ago, before the game story takes place of course, and her mentor was killed by the man/contract she was supposed to kill and has finally found him again after that failure

5)What emotion did they usually pick?

Mostly the sarcasm/sassy ones and the stoic/serious ones

6)What companion are you platonically close with?

I would say Anna is close to Davrin and Bellara the most. After spending time with Davrin, she sees him as a genuine chill guy and not as bad as she thought for a Warden. And sees Bellara as a younger sister, like having Bellara ramble to her about anything

7)Romantically close with?

Lucanis :)

8)Who are they suspicious of?

Neve only cause she doesn’t trust any mages from Minrathous

9)Does your Rook get along with their chosen Faction?

Yes but after the fucking up the Talons operation, its now a “meh”, but slowly getting along again

10)Are they proficient in playing any instruments?

Yes, Anna plays a elven bass, specifically her father’s bassve

11)Weapon of choice?

Dagger and elemental orb, does use a staff from time to time tho. Uses thunder magic but knows a few neurotic spells

12)What is their orientation?

Bisexual

13)What are their thoughts on killing? Is it a necessary evil or do they enjoy it?

I mean to her it’s a necessary cause she is a Crow but if it’s not for her job, she still will depend on the situation

14)What hobbies does your Rook have?

Anna plays music and dances, training either her fighting skills or magic, reads but not as much, gambling in card games and making bets with her fellow Crows, cooking, making poisons and alchemy, and origami

15)What NPCs do they like? Which one's do they dislike?

Anna loves Antoine and Evka and is she is honestly surprised to get along well with the Wardens. Has a love/hate relationship with Viago, sees her as a brother but after sending her away, Anna is piss with him still but their relationship gets better later on in the story. Love Teia but who doesn’t love Teia. Kinda hates Illario but not really at the same time. Really hates the First Warden and Governor Ivenci but yet again she hates politicians/military

16)Do they have a favorite creature in the Thedas?

Likes snakes, halla, and birds

17)Do they enjoy life as an adventurer?

She does, especially when Anna is traveling with Varric to find Solas cause it’s not her typical contract

18)What would your Rook be doing if they weren't recruited by Varric?

Honestly, she would probably be either kick out by crows or might even be kill by them. Or she would still be finding that failed “contract”

19)How do you think they'll meet their end?

Either old age or on a contract

20)Would they side with Solas or fight him?

Anna would fight him for sure

21)What is your Rook's favorite ability?

Void Blade and Tempest

22)What languages is your character fluent in?

Common tongue and Tevinter, some Antivan, and a bit of elvish. But she knows every curse word lol

23)What do they do after an absolute crisis?

She will keep acting her usual self, until Anna is by herself and she will just yell and scream and cry

24)Does your character believe in the afterlife?

Not really

25)What specialization best represents your Rook?

Spellblade cause it was specialise with the Crows but it also works for her story too

26)What animal best represents your Rook?

A cat or maybe a falcon

27)What was their life like before the events of Veilguard?

Lived in Minrathous for 13-15 years, jump on a boat and landed in Trevio, robbed people including Viago, was brought in to the crows by Viago, Viago and someone else(don’t know his name yet)train Anna, loses her other mentor due to her mistakes on a contract, meets Lucanis and gets along with him, Anna gets captured by the Venatori while finding the contract, and gets magic at the age of 32 because of the Venatori

28)Is your character the de facto leader of the party? Or do they consider someone else to be the leader?

Took charge as soon as when Varric ask her to, but Anna is starting to regret it/thinks she is a awful leader after the dragon attack and Weisshaupt

29)If you could choose a different faction for your Rook, which one would they have joined and why?

Anna would either join the Shadow Dragons or Lords of Fortune. For the Shadow Dragons: if she had stayed in Minrathous longer, Anna would have found out about them and joined. For Lords of Fortune: would have probably ended up there instead, Anna didn’t know where the boat would have taken her when she snuck on

30)What's your favorite thing about your Rook?

Anna’s sassness and her relationships with the characters(and looks cause god damn she is fine)

[roadkillxd]

❝ soap pun. ❞

GHOST ANON REQUEST IS NEXT!! I just could not get this out of my fucking head...

Soap x FTM!Reader ↪ 1892 words — 18+ / SMUT.

Content tags — trans male submissive reader, cis male dominant Soap,  unsafe sex, fem terms used for trans male reader’s genitals, mild overstimulation, referenced/implied transphobia, reference to a interrogation/torture scene, mention of pregnancy, vaguely established relationship, Cpt. Price’s trans ex-girlfriend, cunninglingus, pussy worship, very mild breeding kink, mild size kink, penetrative sex, and vaginal sex. 

You and Soap had gotten rather close over the last few weeks or so—ever since he nearly compromised the mission in El Sin Nombre’s compound (the one you’d insisted on going with him on) just because of Valeria getting a little handsy with you following her purred “I like this one.”

She hadn’t appreciated Soap growling to stay away from you, and in all honesty Soap hadn’t planned on saying anything until the words were out of his mouth. It wasn’t until after he realized he’d been jealous. Protectively so. Luckily, things had worked out, and the two of you escaped with El Sin Nombre relatively unharmed.

However, Soap wasn’t a man to sit and wait on those types of feelings. After things had died a bit down with the Al Qutala–Narcos–Russians fiasco he’d pursued you, and you’d happily let him. 

It was really the same old same old, just without the rest of the squad. The two of you at the bar together, or playing poker in either of your quarters. A few nights spent in each other's cots. You’d kissed a few times, heatedly made out once. Testing the waters.

Of course, until now. Johnny had hit the shower after sparring with Ghost and couldn’t stop thinking about you—had marched his way right to your quarters. It was late, but not late enough for you to be asleep. 

You hadn’t had the chance to tell Soap about your… situation. Price was the only one who knew taskforce wise, and he made sure it stayed a need-to-know basis type of thing. Doctors and certain higher-ups and the like. 

But Price accommodated you. Let you use his private shower so you wouldn’t be subjected to the group ones. Said he’d had a girlfriend years and years ago that had been trans—said he’d started and ended enough bar fights protecting her, and that he wasn’t particularly inclined to be throwing fists in the task force if he could avoid it. Not that he suspected any of the close knit soldiers would, but there were friends he’d had back then he’d thought the same about, only for them to end up in a bloody pile on the floor.

You hadn’t really had found a good moment to tell Johnny. You knew he was bisexual, so odds were in your favor, right? He seemed like a pretty laid back guy. Live and let live, maybe, ‘long as you weren’t hurting anybody. But there was always that niggling fear that he wouldn’t be into it, or that he’d be entirely repulsed, or that he’d hurt you. 

And so it isn’t until he’s lowering down your body, trailing kisses over your shirt-clad chest, making his way down to your crotch, that you start to feel anxious.

“You don’t seem as excited—getting a little shy here,” Soap chuckles, nuzzling his stubbled cheek where your packer lumps in your pants.

“Shut up,” you shoot back light-heartedly.

“I’m teasin’. Takes a lil’ bit to get you there, huh?”

“You could say that,” you breathe.

“I do love myself a challenge,” he smiles, leaning back to quickly tug your pants and boxers down in one swoop. The packer of course goes with it, and you hold your breath, staring at the wall caught between desperately wanting to see Soap’s reaction and being too terrified to know.

“Fuckin’ hell…” he groans. You jolt slightly, shivering as a thick calloused thumb swipes curiously through your folds, “damn beautiful, this. You just get better n’ better, love.”

“You don’t mind?” You eye him warily, mind going a little fuzzy already from how he continues to thumb just above your mound.

“You know my preferences. It’s just the best of both worlds, yeah? Lovely braw like you with an even prettier pussy—shite, uh, if those type o’ words are, y’know, fine with you,” he tacks on, demeanor shifting to something a little more nervous, like he’s worried he might’ve offended you. The thought makes you smile.

“I don’ mind, Johnny,” you murmur, looking up at him eyes half-lidded, cheeks flushed. 

Johnny smiles soft, eyes tracing back down to your folds, his smile turning into a sharp grin as a thick glob of slick leaks from your hole and between your cheeks.

“Aye, I don’t think she minds either,” he chuckles, reaching down to spread your folds for a better view. He thumbs at your cocklet, staring enraptured. He’s never seen one before—a clit so engorged and thick. It looks so much more like a small little cock than a normal clit, and he curiously pulls the thick foreskin down over the little mushroom head before leaning down to lick at the sensitive little nub with the tip of his tongue, wondering if you’re just as sensitive there as a cis man. 

He gets his answer when you gasp high and squeaky at the sudden overstimulation, his tongue swiping down beneath the ridge at the little bumps there. It makes you burn with pleasure, like a raw wound being dug at. Soap growls when you grip a hand tight in his mohawk, tugging hard at the strands. The vibrations make you moan in return, his mouth moving to envelop the rest of your cock in hot, wet suction, bobbing his head ever so minutely up and down the small length. 

Soap looks pure blissed out, eyes—darkened by his enlarged pupils—staring up at you hazily, or fluttering shut as he moans and growls against your cunt, licking into your fluttering hole. His bulky arms are looped around your legs, hands holding hard onto the fat on the top of your thigh, grip squeezing and desperate.

The assault on your pussy quickly crescendos, the overwhelming heat in your lower tummy bursting as you rock your hips against his mouth, facefucking him as you cum. 

Soap fucking whimpers, lapping desperately at your leaking slick like he’s worried he can’t get it all into his mouth fast enough. He licks you long after you’ve finished, making your hips twitch with overstimulation. 

When he finally pulls away, your body’s lax and loose, and you realize it’s probably exactly what he wants, and even though you know how loving and caring Johnny can be it still surprises you when he puts an arm either side of your head, holding his weight above you as he noses at your jaw until you bare your neck to him.

He presses sucking kisses to the flushed skin there, his hips rocking gently against your thigh. You can feel his hard cock through his jeans, how it jumps and twitches in the fabric everytime you whimper or moan from his attention.

He pulls back, hand gently cupping your chin to make you look up at him. He smiles so, so soft. It makes your heart flutter and drop.

“Would you wanna go further with me, love?”

You hum, hand in his short hair again to pull him closer to you, mumbling a “fuck yes,” as your lips collide. He groans, kissing you slow and forceful—with an intent you can’t quite decipher. 

“Good boy,” he rumbles.

You can feel, can hear, as he starts to try and shimmy out of his pants without separating your mouths. You worm your arm down to grab at his wrist and he pauses, looking up at you with questioning eyes.

“Leave them on?”

He smiles.

“Anything you want.”

He sits up, reaching down to go and pull himself out, but you stop him again. You sit up with him, which he didn’t quite expect. Then you’re tugging at the hem of his shirt.

“Off,” you demand. He happily obliges you, lifting his arms to help you pull it off.

You’re immediately on him, hands cupping his weighty pecs, thumbing at his pert nipples. He bites his lip, pectoral muscles flexing as he arches into the touch.

You lean forward to lick at his nipple, taking the hard bud into your mouth to suck hard. He groans, a hand resting gently at the back of your head, neither pushing nor pulling.

“That’s damn good,” he groans, low and rough. You hear the shuffle of fabric and open your eyes, pulling back to see Soap’s cock, thick and hard and dripping as he furiously strokes himself, biting back his gravelly noises.

“Johnny,” you purr. He opens his eyes—doesn’t remember having closed them—and meets yours half-lidded and drunk, “fuck me already.”

He steadies the hand on his cock, holding it tight at the base as his free hand gently pushes at your chest to lay back. He positions himself, hauling you into his lap with only one hand on your hip. He slaps his cock against your mound, groaning at the wet crack that emits.

“Condom?” He grunts—sounds out of it. Less than an afterthought as he starts to gently slide his cock between your slick folds.

“No,” you grunt, arching your hips until you feel his cockhead catch on your hole, “can’t knock me up.”

“Christ, isn’t that a thought,” he huffs with a smile, starting to press his hips forward, your muscles still lax from your orgasm providing little resistance. 

“Fucckk,” Soap groans out as he slides into the hilt, “mmm, y’little cunt’s squeezin’ me so tight…”

“Fucking hell, Johnny—“ you gasp out at his words, back arching and hips pressing down, feeling how the thick girth of his base spreads your entrance that ever slight bit more.

He starts to rock his hips, quickly picking up a brutal pace that has you clawing at his back. He shivers at the thought of the other’s seeing the markings later in the showers. Wonders if they’ll be able to tell who did it. He sucks a hickey onto your shoulder for good measure.

“Listen to ‘er squelch,” he growls, teeth bared against your throat as your face heats. He’s right, though—the obscene, wet sounds of your pussy adjusting to his massive girth sends a thrill through the both of you. 

You’re unbelievably wet, slick gushing out of you nonstop. He can feel it against his balls every time they slap against your ass, and they draw up tighter at the sensation each time. 

Soap’s rambling something in scots against your ear, voice deep and gravelly as he rocks into you. The denim of his jeans rubs your thighs deliciously raw, cunt squeezing tight around the other’s cock from the onslaught of sensations. 

Your orgasm sneaks up on you, though not unexpected. It rocks through your body, vision whitening as your hole spasms around Soap’s pulsing length. He shouts your name as he cums mere seconds after, burying to the hilt, thick ropes of spend filling your insides, hot and sticky. 

He groans through it, hips rocking jarringly as your pussy coaxes every last drop from him. He stays buried in you, even as he softens, carefully resting his weight upon you with a satisfied moan. You pet at his hair, the both of you coming down from your highs ever so slowly.

Soap sniffs, pets at your hip, and glances up at you through thick lashes.

“When I pulled your pants down? There was a good second there I’d thought your pecker had fallen off,” he grins.

You push him off of you with a laugh and he tackles you back down, struggling to kiss you through the both of your wide smiles.

[qwuilty]

seeing gapteethed's post reminded me i need to post my headcanons so um.

Oooh you're gonna read my indepth A&D headcanons below oooooooh

Ethan:

The youngest of the two siblings, Ethan is about 2 years younger than Carlie was.

His parents i think are fairly well off enough but not like Rich, i see them kinda like Scott Pilgrim’s parents, being able to support themselves and their kids and unintentionally kind of spoiling him in a way due to being new parents.

Because of his powers he doesn’t have a lot of long term scarring (more often than not something would inevitably ‘reset’ him back) but he does have some crowded teeth and acne scarring from even before he got his powers.

I headcanon he definitely has autism and ADHD (I mean look at him. It's canon to ME), and I think he also has some form of anxiety disorder and being prone to spiraling but he’s coped with it through distraction most of his life. None of these are diagnosed due to generally being brushed off as “just how he is”.

Struggles mostly with fine motor skills and focus leading to his clumsiness, over time he’s gotten better at socializing with others but still tends to have his ‘moments’ hence his general antics. Lucas and Carlie were his only real friends growing up.

He’s “straight” on paper, more so bisexual with a fem lean. He’s not even in denial, it’s just something he hasn’t really thought about and since he wasn’t 100% Into Guys like Lucas was, he just kinda left it at “Well i must be straight then”. Yknow that post that’s like “I think im nonbinary but I have to work so I don't really care about that rn”? That’s Ethan’s approach to his identity.

High-school level education, he never really saw much point in continuing it further and instead worked for a while until deciding to take the risk to open Gamehaven. Owns about the largest portion of the company due to the general assets being under his name.

In terms of work he doesn’t really do well with numbers + has a very loose idea of actually Running A Business but he does put in a lot of work in terms of physical stocking of shelves, event planning, and can handle most of the basics. What he lacks in understanding he makes up in enthusiasm.

His special interests mostly consist of superheroes (even before getting his own powers), the crown bowl, and gaming in general with heavier focus on series like Monster Hunter and Fallout. Hyperfocus is both his greatest strength and worst weakness as well as general tendency to bounce from interest to interest.

Irish American, similar to him in CAD.

Has a lot of little rusty skills he’s picked up over time, he’s actually not very mechanically inclined but he does enjoy creative stuff and can do some repair work with the help of Lucas and some videos. He’s innately curious.

Owns two separate phones, his actual one and the burner he calls the “Analog Phone” for all the calls to take as Analog. Until he exchanged numbers with Lilah, he never actually really used it.

Lucas:

Only child of a single mother, no real confirmed reason for this one it’s just Vibes.

Italian American, I think I saw somewhere someone said this was canon to CAD Lucas but i don't know if i ever actually found that out, it does feel right to me.

Used to play baseball like CAD Lucas had, but unlike him he kept up more with it. I see CAD Lucas being more bulky, bear type build with some muscle definition and A&D Lucas is more otter style build because he does more general workout + some slight “for aesthetics” reasons compared to pure bulk, also hero work just entails a lot of physical exercise.

Has to deal with chronic pain, as he has no form of natural ‘healing’ the physical damage and overexertion has caught up with him and it flares up every so often. What doesn’t help is he’s stubborn as an Ox and pushes through it, even when he REALLY shouldn’t. Some days are fine, he’s able to work and move around perfectly fine and some days he’s hobbling around and having pain spikes as well as generalized dull aching. More of a “throw back an Advil and just pretend it isn’t hurting” kind of guy.

Just generally very bad at being completely honest about himself and his emotions, he’s able to balance being “open” with others in a mostly sarcastic joking way and yet being incredibly closed off in terms of his actual feelings. He’s very cautious and has been burnt before. Constantly on the edge of being confident in himself in terms of physical aesthetics and terrified of anyone actually getting to know him.

Because he, again, has no form of healing he has a lot of small, faint scars on his body that have had to been patched up by Scott, they’re mostly healed but they still stay on the skin.

He’s canonically gay and I also see him as Demiromantic bordering mostly Aromantic. He’s much more comfortable and driven to physical intimacy than anything further than that and usually that’s fine for him, but his romantic intimacy skills are much more rusty because he just doesn’t feel that as strongly.

Has been friends with Ethan since elementary similar to CAD, did have a crush on him more so around middle school when he was coming to terms with being gay but those feelings have mostly come to pass and he sees him more platonically now. Also had his growth spurt later than Ethan, a fact that Ethan greatly enjoyed for a few months until he finally caught up with him.

Autistic, just on a much more ‘stealth’ level compared to either Ethan and Scott. He didn’t really want to delve too deep into it, so he’s gotten by just being “A little intense about things” or “Just a little weird at times”. Gets obsessive over his hobbies and interests, but plays them off more casually if not talking to Scott or Ethan because he fears judgment.

The least close to Carlie out of the three, but the two had been fairly close for his standards. She was the first person he felt comfortable coming out to (Or more so just happened to be the one in the room at 2 AM at a sleepover when he felt he had to get it out to SOMEONE) and she swore not to tell anyone about it. They had a relationship where they simultaneously knew very little about each other but also trusted the other on an unspoken level.

Went to a community college for about a year, loosely following for a computer science degree before taking the risk with Ethan for Gamehaven to put in some of his savings for a share of the company.

Handles most of the orders and works along with Ethan front-desk, being sort of the glue holding the other two together. Also able to lift heavier machines and move things around due to being the strongest of the trio.

TTRPG fan, enjoys games with solid gameplay loops and a focus on story, also enjoys playing 40k Warhammer.

Scott:

My specifics are still kind in the air about him, but I imagine him being mixed with (for now unless things change) a Greek-German father and a Turkish (GET IT CAUSE BIRD) – Indian mother. Mostly grew up in Germany as the middle child of three siblings who moved ‘temporarily’ to America to pursue a degree at MIT and live with some family there.

Due to his disability and general lack of ability or desire to see his family however, he is essentially landlocked in America and is unable to see his family back home unless they’re able to go over to see him.

Still knows a good bit of German but it has become more lost to time, doesn’t know much as much Turkish, Greek, or Hindi besides a few key phrases here and there.

I think his family is very well off, much more so even compared to Ethan’s, thus even allowing Scott to go to MIT along with general scholarships and such as well as allowing him to live in a fairly expensive apartment, though along with working he also does do additional work with repairs and coding to keep himself above waters and pay for additional technology.

Graduated with a Bachelor of Science in Computer Science, Economics, and Data Science (at the cost of several gray hairs on his already early graying head), mostly focusing on his degree at the cost of his social life so Carlie was one of his only friends and first and only partner before her death.

Wasn’t very close with Ethan until her death, in my mind they have a very ‘my dumbass brother’ type relationship.

In terms of the business he handles the accounting side and numbers of the business, technically has the least share of the company but he doesn’t really care to “own” Gamehaven anyways. He just wants to show up to work, get his paycheck, and do something he finds fulfilling. (Plus Ethan and Lucas tend to be more understanding of his needs and problems than a traditional work environment)

A massive geek at heart, having fixations on sci-fi or fantasy media like Beserk and Star Wars. Didn’t engage much with it out loud back home but has been able to slowly break out of his shell at Gamehaven because of the already very geeky environment and become more Him.

Also Autistic, in fact he’s the only one who is formally diagnosed. Low empathy, struggling with black and white thinking as well as adjusting to change. Depressive like in canon, varying levels of functioning depending on energy levels. Strongest symptoms relate mostly to insomnia and negative self image.

Demibiromantic and Amantesexual, but again, only partner he’s had has been Carlie.

Picks up multiple hobbies and skills to keep his mind busy, in terms of games he enjoys mechanics focused ones such as Dwarf Fortress, Rimworld, and Factorio. Also plays 40k with Lucas and enjoys RPGs like Zelda and Fallout, being more a fan of the earlier games compared to Ethan preferring the later games.

His hair is naturally curlier, around a 2C texture, but to make it easier to manage he tends to straighten it down.

Big fan of console modding and right to repair, not as Full Speed for the sake of jokes as his CAD counterpart, but does still hold a very pro-linux standpoint.

Prone to compulsive lying out of a desire to either keep things close to his chest or to protect others.

Does try to make sure he has a good physical health in terms of taking medication and doing the general things he Should, but he's not great at taking care of himself on a mental level. Also just general hygiene issues that come with depression.